Living in the burbs

So much material available from my neighborhood I don't know where to start. Amazing amount of paranoia that can certainly be exploited to embellish lyrics. A living breathing evolving song.

I'll never forget my dog when she was younger kept going under the fence to see the other dog next door which was being neglected by the neighbors. It was severely overweight and the kid it was purchased for wanted nothing to do with it after it became a dog. My puppy went over there so much the neighbor got the idea I was trying to bang his wife and her gray teeth. One day to profess his love in front of me mind you he kissed her. It was so awkward. I thought no wonder she wants me to bang her. The kiss was so primitive and without feeling save for the percussion of impact and friction upon the enamel. I waited for their lips to fatten up after such a display.

His idea to keep her satisfied was buy her a 12 pack of bud light, some whiskey, money for scratch tickets and a car. That's love where I come from.

Well one day there was yelling. I was like oh goodie domestic violence. The dog bit the female. Same thing happened again this time it bit the kid and the owner beat the thing. Then I noticed it was gone. He didn't have the balls to do it himself so he ordered his "bitch" to put the thing down.

I'm not so sure the kid got bit or wasn't at fault. You see his older brother got bit by their previous dog. I saw the whole thing. Crocodile tears. He didn't get bit at all he was looking for attention or sympathy  he would never get from his father who only cared about sports and beer. Years later he would bang his girl but 1st take the dog and tie him by the leash to the basketball pole in 3 degree weather. The dog howled.

But back to last fall the neighbor went away and his women all crying came to tell me all her problems about how she had to put the dog down. She was freshly bathed and had on some kind of lotion. Her idea was a fuck. She was drunk. I was high. Somewhere in her mind she invented a fantasy world that the songs I was singing were some how directed at her. I used to sing to the clouds. I often sang country tunes which deeply disturbed my neighbor. Lot of country songs are about real things. They're adult music well old country is. It's not for zit popping night as a sexually frustrated teen or I should say insecure teeth that only likes the hard stuff. Some of the hardest stuff i've ever heard is the things that are hardest to say.To quote the Flying Burrito Brother "we've all got wheels to take ourselves away, we've got telephones to say what we can't say".  Other neighbors it's the same thing. They only want to hear lies.

Being a very creative person with a bohemian beatnik spirit they should have observed some discretion with the crap they say. At least have the courtesy to wait until I'm out of hearing range. That would be about 1000 yards. Thought of a good idea for a song..."Don't blame me when your wife cheats on you". It's really going to sink in when i work out the details, syntax etc as they sit on their porch eating some kind of roadkill. They won't be able to take it and will turn on the radio and play the same crappy songs of course that will continue the conflict as the father will want some pimple popping metallica  and his son will agree and the wife will go along but deep down she'll never be touched. I bet she's never had an orgasm with him...the dog is a different story but he's gone.

I predict a shot gun or rifle is pointed at me soon enough.